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Say the Magic Words
by Linda Larsen, CSP
© Copyright 2000

Looking back, the situation was rather comical. At the time, however, it was anything but funny.

Because the remodeling of our house was taking so long, we decided to employ a few time saving measures. One such measure was to order pre-made wood bathroom cabinets from a local building supply store. They looked pretty good, they were the right price, and they could be delivered within 10 days. All seemed right with the world.

When the cabinets arrived and we unpacked the boxes, we found that they had been damaged in route. Several of the pieces had serious cracks and had obviously been mishandled in route to our house. As frustrating as it was, we knew we had to box the cabinets back up and return them. Accordingly, we notified the store of the problem and my husband told them that, since it would take them several weeks to get someone back out to pick them up, he would load them up and bring them back himself.

Well, let's put it this way. There were about 12 linear feet of cabinets, 37 inches high and about 27 inches deep. Cabinets that my husband somehow figured he could get into or on top of his Volvo station wagon.

And he studied advanced physics in graduate school. Right.

Anyway, he put some of them inside the wagon and then strapped 2 others on the top of the car. He looked like something from the Beverly Hillbillies. I watched him drive slowly off as I thought, "I don't know. Something just doesn't feel right about this to me."

It was about 20 minutes later that John walked back in the house. He looked ashen and somewhat sick. I started to tell him about something, but when I saw his face I said, "Oh my gosh, what happened?"

He told me that the 2 large cabinets had flown off the top of the car as he was driving along and had bounced down the road behind him, exploding into about a million pieces.

My first instinct was to say "WHAT? They did WHAT?" I could not believe what I was hearing. I started to say, well, you can imagine what I was about to say, when he said the most stunning thing. I believe they truly were magic words because they stopped me dead in my tracks and turned my anger into compassion in a nanosecond. .

He said, straightforwardly and without hesitation, "Linda. I need your forgiveness." No defensiveness, no excuses, just a clear request.

Wow. In that very moment, I must tell you, he got what he was asking for. Instantly. There was something about his demeanor that was so open and honest that I could not hold on to my anger. I immediately put myself in his place and understood what he was experiencing

The next time you do something that you that you know was wrong, why not step up, own up and say the magic words: "I need your forgiveness."

It's amazing what those words can do!

Word count: 508

Tag line: Linda Larsen, CSP, helps individuals think strategically, communicate effectively, and celebrate success. She is an international keynote speaker, trial consultant and author of the book, True Power, and the best selling audio program, 12 Secrets to High Self-Esteem. She can be reached at www.lindalarsen.com or 941-927-4700.

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