Funny Motivational Speaker Linda Larsen presents...

Linda's Positively Speaking Blog

Rants & Raves by Funny Motivational Speaker Linda Larsen

Jan
2019

But I Don't WANT to Rub Elbows

By Linda Larsen - Wednesday, January 30, 2019
Featured Image

I got the opportunity recently to practice a technique that is very effective in dealing with, as I have laughingly called them, "People who don't behave."

First of all, here are the 4 things to do before you address the problem:

  1. Let go of the idea that the other person is WRONG for doing what he did. He did it. It's done. Hold, instead, the interpretation that although his actions don't work for you, they made perfect sense to him.
  2. Keep your voice level and calm.
  3. Maintain an open, relaxed face.
  4. Use as few words as possible. Think "short, simple and direct."

Picture the scene: We are boarding the plane. I sit on an aisle seat next to a man who is already seated in the center seat. His wife was on the other side of him, next to the window. I place my bag under the seat in front of me, buckle my seat belt and settle in for the flight. I notice that his elbow is firmly planted on the armrest between our seats so I gently slip my elbow behind his and claim the back section of the armrest.

It is at this point that he shifts his weight in his seat and makes certain that his elbow presses harder against mine. I'm talking quite hard. His nonverbal comment screamed, "Oh no you don't! I had this armrest first and you're not getting it!"

The passive part of me wanted to quickly remove my arm and then silently fume for the next hour. The aggressive part of me wanted to dig my elbow back into his arm and show him that he couldn't bully me, by gosh! Instead the assertive part of me stepped up to the plate and handled it GREAT! Incorporating all 4 of the above elements, I said, "I tell you what. I'll take the back half of the armrest and you take the front. Does that work for you?"

I sounded so even, unflappable and straightforward that I kind of stunned myself. Whatever the outcome I knew in that moment that I handled the situation effectively. And then, after a brief hesitation, he mumbled, "Yeah, I guess that's OK." Then he relaxed his arm and let me have half the space.

You gotta love it.

Practice this technique - a lot. In low-risk situations. With your dog, your cat, your unborn child. You'll get good at it. You'll develop a really good habit. And you'll be able to rub elbows with the best of them!

 

Linda Larsen, Speaker Hall of FameĀ® Keynote speaker, author and former professional comedic actress, brings entertaining, content-rich, hilarious and riveting presentations to conferences world-wide. She is passionate about helping people realize their fullest potential in every area of their lives and live with what she calls, "Honker Happiness." Best-selling author of 12 Secrets to High Self-Esteem audio program, 5 video programs and the critically acclaimed book, True Power. She can be reached at http://www.lindalarsen.com and 941-927-4700


About the Author

Linda Larsen, CSP, CPAE is a Hall of Fame Speaker, professional actress, best-selling author and serious lover of doggies. Linda speaks at conferences and meetings around the world, helping people bring the very best version of themselves to life every day! To talk to Linda about how she can contribute to the success of your next event, call 941-927-4700. Or go to Book Linda Now!



Like this blog? Share it!



Recent Posts

Archive

Categories

Tag Cloud

negative thinking goal achievement bad drivers Meryl Runion motivational speaker Linda Larsen motivational speaker on customer service changing behaviors raving fans humor parenting how to listen controlling your emotional state reframing self confidence listening Dr. Phil self talk stonewalling beauty encouragement panic attacks Tim Richardson complainers advertising how to strengthen relationships raising happy children losing weight fear of trump presidency Lenscrafters Changing perspectives personal responsibility gratitude how to become a motivational speaker Asolo State Theater customer service training building rapport PhotoShop motivational speaker contempt gift ideas remodel stress truth in politics handling fear Noah Racey's Pulse actors positive perspective Hamilton motivational speakers defensiveness personal achievement whiners joy liking marshmallow test humorous motivational speaker self-image motivational speaker success Broadway communication costumes truth speak up time management building character Lin-Manuel Miranda habits linda larsen dental practice how to have high self-esteem facebook activity nonverbal communication understanding proactive people friendships customer service secrets positive attitude the business of motivational speaker personal growth Politifact best bed for bad back bucket list National Car Rental motivational speaker on communication learning clinical depression successful dental practices political anxiety getting to yes stress management attitude overcoming adversity change compassion iPhone4S managing stress divorce statistics personality types communication model motivational speaker Brad Montgomery motivation zig ziglar back relief changing habits effective communication brain chemistry unhappy employees funny video aging achievements sleep funny motivational speaker Linda Larsen relationship building fact checking healthcare flying eyebrows southern accent stressful elections Hillary Clinton laughter passion how to happy listening skills Dr. Brene Brown, The Wholehearted Parenting Manifesto chronic back pain happy customers latex mattress review vision boards lying in politics conflict management Kelly Swanson funny motivational speakers selling happiness dr. john gottman coping with anxiety happiness patient service trust in relationships difficult patients speaking nightmares mans search for meaning finding humor Delta acting husbands who don't listen good night's sleep gender communication magic act funny motivational speaker cell phone addiction happiness at work anxiety confidence Shakespeare, thank-you notes Kay Frances Donald Trump dental practice strategies power of a smile expectations customer service holiday stress difficult people marriage Conrad Hall Gary Marachek multi-tasking shakespeare success how to deal with negative people bipolar disorder mattress recommendation Viktor Frankl American Idol achieving success feeling good how to get what you want communication skills tension public speaking horror stories personal development airline pilots bottom line improvement attitudes election 2016 appreciation depression what you name the thing criticism goal setting gripers mental illness high self-esteem cheerleading